chart up your insides

Once upon a time I had cancer. A really weird chemo and radiation reistant kind that resulted first in a death sentence and then, thanks to same brilliant doctors, a massive surgery to remove it along with most of my trachea. Every cough makes me nervous now because thats how it all started.. with a cough. I don't have the same cough, I have A cough, which I always have. What I do have however is lump in my throat, under my chin.. that area. It makes me nervous, it makes H nervous so I finally went to the dr. today and of course it made her nervous too... so off to the radiology to find out just what it is. Now, history shows that is will be nothing. Millions of scares, only ONE has been cancer so no reason for this silly little lump to be any different but I'm nervous anyways. It's there and it shouldn't be... that scares me, even if it's nothing. My appt is 4:15 which makes 4:20 a little hard to hit today, and no joke, I need the anxiety help :(